My 7th Year

For some days now, I have been feeling sort of uneasy. The cause of the un-easiness has proved to be elusive and un-pin-downable though, what with everything I do contributing towards making me feel ill at ease. It's not like I am doing stuff I am not supposed to be doing or anything. But in spite of that, it's been quite some time since I have felt at ease.

This internal and personal un-ease has manifested itself in the form of rants and wannabe rants that I am trying to dress up and disguise as my posts of late. It's the same reason why I have been finding fault with regular, run-of-the-mill, inane stuff like the hours in a day and the days in a week. Given this trend, I will probably come up with a rant about the number of weeks and months as well. So the question for me to answer is, 'Why the unease? Why this feeling of discontent?' Now I am realizing that I might have, unknowingly, figured out why I have been feeling the way I have been feeling.

This day, 17th of September, might have something to do with it. (I am not sure if the same date from 6 years back can be called the same day but I will anyway.) This was the same day on which, exactly 6 years back, I stepped, for the first time, through the doors and onto the multi-hued carpet of the organization that had, for some unfathomable reason, deemed me good enough to work for them. My first job. That marked my transition from a student to a regular wage-earner and back then that sounded and felt great. I still remember planning for all the neat stuff I would be spending my salary on. But that was then. Fast forward exactly 6 years and today my take on this whole 'job' thing reflects an image of sober, and properly grounded, optimism rather than one of stratospheric euphoria.

But what does all this have to do with me feeling un-easy? Well, the answer to that is very simple. As the 17th of September drew closer, my subconscious did the required math and figured out that I was going to be starting my 7th working year. That is after completing 6 full years doing the same. 6 years after making the move away from what used to be a carefree student life. I still remember my first day in college, which was, as of today, more than 10 years back! Looking back now, all those years seem to have come and gone in a wink. And I am still thinking about them!! Am not sure if this is a sign that I should grow up and accept my place in reality, but I definitely know one thing. I am growing old, fast! And that is slightly not easy to accept.